I’m not doing well in my classes. However, I realized that it doesn’t really matter. The very thing I must put as my first priority in my life is to love God and love my brothers and sisters. That does not mean going to FiCB. It could help, but they don’t equal to each other. Truly. Love God. That’s the first thing and the only thing that should matter. But honestly, it is also very difficult. It is very hard. I am so caught up on the fact that what if I mess up and screw up my future? What if I don’t get to do what I want to do?
So What? (That’s what I wish to say. I wish I was brave enough to say those words, but I am too weak) God is so amazing and gracious. My roommate told me, God loved us so much He created the universe. God loved us so much that He even gave up His Son for us. What more can we ask? What more? How else do we wish to prove God’s love for us? God is love.
I wish to love You. When I sing praise songs that say, “I love you,” I cannot state those words together because I know that I love the world – the materials that exist in this world. I wish to marry. I wish to have a child. I wish to have a future. And I know that I cannot love both. However, I can sing “How He loves”. Thank You Lord, for giving me that praise song – a song that I can mean every word.